'Marites' couple? New study says gossiping may benefit romantic relationships
Being a "Marites," if too much, isn't cool—but new research found that it may actually benefit romantic relationships.
In a study from the University of California, published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, researchers assessed 76 couples of same and different genders.
Participants from Southern California wore portable electronically activated recorders, which captured ambient sound from the environment throughout the day. The EAR sampled 14% of their 16-hour waking day, which included their daily routines and conversations in public and private settings.
Researchers found that the instances of gossip among couples were "positively associated" with happiness and relationship quality.
"Given that romantic partners are primary sources of conversation and emotional exchanges for many adults, gossip may play a particularly important role in strengthening these bonds," they said.
In a 16-hour waking day, participants gossiped for about 38 minutes, 29 minutes of which were with their romantic partners.
Woman-woman couples spent about 6.72 minutes gossiping more than woman-man couples, who gossiped 4.80 minutes more than man-woman, who gossiped 6.72 minutes more than man-man.
WW and MM couples self-reported similar levels of happiness, with the former reporting the highest relationship quality on average relative to others in the study. WM couples reported the lowest levels of happiness.
According to researchers, gossips about shared networks or mutual acquaintances serve as a form of emotional bonding and facilitate more communication among partners. Gossiping, as a shared activity, may reinforce the perception that partners are “on the same team,” enhancing feelings of connectedness, trust, and other positive relationship qualities.
Researchers cited as an example couples who negatively gossip on their way home from a party could have a stronger bond than their friends in that party. Couples who positively gossip, meanwhile, could prolong their fun experiences.
Moreover, gossiping can serve as a social regulation or norm-learning tool within relationships. As couples discuss the behaviors and actions of others, their discussions could help align their own expectations and behaviors, contributing to a harmonious relationship.
"This alignment may lead to greater happiness, as both partners feel understood and supported," researchers said.
Researchers concluded that by using EAR, a naturalistic observation method, the study yields insights "beyond the laboratory and what people can recall or report."
They, however, acknowledged that the study was limited as the first step in a novel line of research on couples’ gossip.
They didn't examine the subject of the gossip, the setting where the gossiping took place, and other descriptive factors. Those factors, however, paved the way for future questions, such as whether different types of gossip relate differently to well-being, whether gossip facilitates relationship maintenance behaviors such as support, and whether gossiping within a couple promotes well-being.
They also wondered whether the findings generalize to populations outside Southern California.